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2008-04-08 05:01:56
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Article by Alan Rogers |
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Two days ago, I noticed that my mouth was hanging open and drool was cascading into my cereal. This event caused me to question if my medication dosage was a tiny bit too high. My spit mixing with the oatmeal enraged me enough to smash the bowl in my sink. I made an appointment to see my doctor.
Thank God for the discovery of psychiatry. It makes me wonder how people ever managed to deal with their problems before antidepressants and the voodoo theories of psychobabble came along. After meeting with my psychiatrist, I realized they simply don't know what they are talking about.
I always believed when I got pissed off and smashed things it was simply because of my anger. According to my psychiatrist nothing can be that easily explained. The good doctor informed me that I have Intermittent Explosive Disorder. The best news was when he said it wasn't my fault. Thank you psychiatry for eradicating my responsibility, and enabling me to feel good about my actions.
They will come up with a syndrome next. It always rotates back and forth, syndromes and disorders. There's something for everybody, and the pharmaceutical companies will invent a pill to support your diagnosis. Hopefully your doctor will give you the correct dosage.
The doctors have all the answers, but I'm left with questions. Why does the mention of oral competition excite me? How far can you walk if your feet are asleep? Why do worms float in my toilet? The snake is in my belly and the dog is in my bones. Do they have a medication for that?
After taking a bite from my hot-dog at lunch today, I noticed a worm inside the remaining wiener. I paused to consider why God would allow me to suffer this indignation. The minuscule white parasite did not seem to be moving so I covered it with more mustard and continued eating. Maybe it was my imagination, but it tasted bitter. Having your medication adjusted allows you to adapt and become a problem solver.
Thank God for the wonders of psychiatry.
My novel Lyam's Journal was published 2/01/08 and is available toll free at 877-BUY-BOOK or online at bbotw.com or amazon.com you can read an excerpt from the novel at
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